The Sounds of Marriage <3

“What does your marriage sound like?”

This past weekend, we heard a message from Pastor Ashley Wooldridge at CCV that definitely left an impression on us.

He spoke about the “noisy” part of marriage which usually comes from our “expectations” of one another. Wow. Yessss sir! There are many of those, huh? lol .. But through an awesome message, he was able to spell out the solution and make it simple for us… from the laughter and humor to a few tears and those “aaaha!” moments…this message really hit home.

I just had to share this video.. Its 35 minutes short. As you are folding laundry or washing the dishes or if you are able to set a date with with your spouse, I definitely encourage you to have a listen..whether you are alone or together, I’m sure it will bless you.  He also gave out a little homework assignment that we are so excited to get to. I’ll type it up here at the bottom of the page along with the notes so that, if your are interested, you can do it as well. 🙂

Or watch it at:

https://ccv.church/watch/message?MessageId=588

 

And here are the notes!

What causes so much noise in marriage? 

MY expectations —–GAP—–Reality in marriage

The root issue….The expectations that I brought into my marriage are usually centered on ME

God designed marriage to be centered around WE not ME

For this reason man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh, therefore what God has joined together let no man separate. Matthew 19:5-6

The Solution: 

MUTUAL SUBMISSION  is God’s design to fill the gaps in marriage between expectation and reality

Ephesians 5:21,33

………..

-HOME WORK-

…Listen and learn….

By practicing the art of humility and mutual submission your marriage will grow.

Before you begin…A few rules 😉 

Choose a time when you are both in a good mood and location where you will not be interrupted

Allow your spouse to answer without giving a rebuttal or response

Fight the urge to defend, discount or rationalize anything they bring up

As your spouse shares, take notes and internalize – submit to their reality

Take notes and try to put into practice the things your spouse has shared

This is not a time to share all the sins of your spouse – your responses should be said with respect and love – believe the best about your spouse

Begin and end your time in prayer being reminded that Christ is our ultimate example of humility and submission

Here are the Questions to ask your spouse

What do you think our biggest win was this past year?

What was the last thing I did that made you feel loved or admired?

Is there anything I do that embarrasses you or makes you feel uncomfortable?

What legacy do you want our marriage to leave?

Where do you feel the most pressure to live up to my expectations?

What is one thing I can do to love you more? Daily, weekly or regularly.

I hope you loved it as much as I did! Oh, and wasn’t that music video there at the beginning of the video awesome? Definitely had me smiling! 🙂 Can’t wait to read your thoughts. 🙂